Finally, not drowning but waving
Boy, this surely is a long, painful process. But I do believe some of myself is coming back to me. I'm certainly acting more like myself, and I feel a little more like myself, so it's all good, right?
Now, what's been happening. The training at work is finally done (YAY!). The bad news? We go live with the new software on Monday. Not so much yay. In fact, the direct opposite of yay.
Lemme see ... this is going to be slightly random, because it's been a while and I'm trying to remember as much as I can.
Went to the movies this week and saw M:I:3 and gosh darn, it was fun. Big, dumb, testosteroney fun. It's a really good action film. No smarts at all, but if you want a smart film, you don't go to something like M:I:3. I also saw My Own Private Idaho on DVD; I had never seen it and naively rented the special edition, thinking I'd find insights from Gus Van Sant but nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ... he's not in the special features at all! There's all kinds of other people talking about how great he was to work with and how visionary his film was. Which is true. So where's The Man himself? According to Amazon, there's a Criterion version with commentary. That's the one I need to try and find.
I managed to walk to work three days this week and found I actually slept a little better. Which, for me, is a triumph of fairly epic proportions. I've been sleeping horribly.
Except for last night, when somehow, I ended up at M's house for Shabbat dinner and didn't get home until midnight. It did beat spending the night on the couch eating toast and watching TV, though. I also think I'm coming to some kind of peace about how M and I are friends.
I do all the running and she sits and waits for favours, like royalty. Now that I'm no longer tying myself up in knots about it, I'm fine. Because hanging out with M can be fun sometimes.
And I did have fun last night; good food (really good food), good company ... the cats weren't happy when I got home, but you don't always get what you want.
We also went out yesterday for lunch for Mother's birthday. All of us ''girls'' apart from my sister in law whose in Oz at the moment. Mother enjoyed herself, which was the point of the excercise, so all good.
I got J to help me sort through a bunch of charts last week, for a new start. I didn't need a new start as such, but it felt good _ like a symbol of me coming back to myself, or something. OR, I'm starting to disappear up my own metaphor. Ouch.
Anyway. Things are ... better. And better is good. :)