It's a year tomorrow ...

... since my Dad died suddenly, at the age of 83. No, he wasn't young, but he was in good health. He and Mum still lived in their own house, he still gardened, visited 'the elderly' at a couple of rest homes, put his $1 bets on the horses and generally enjoyed his life. He had a massive heart attack in bed at home. Which, if he could have chosen, would have been the way he wanted to go _ he would have hated being sick, or fading away.
For selfish reasons, I wish that heart attack could have been put off _ just for a few more years. But it wasn't meant to be.
So that was how my year started, and naturally, it coloured the days, weeks and months that followed.
I was the youngest of five; very much a Daddy's girl, being a (relatively) late in life child for both parents.
I still miss my Dad every day; especially now that we're preparing for a baby of our own, who will never know his grandad.
My sister had her baby Jacob in February, making '06 hard for her in a different way.
I changed shifts at work in July, going from days back to nights, which was an ... interesting transition. It's been good overall, I think. I'm not a morning person by nature and I really did struggle with it - especially going back to work after Dad died.
Anyway. Moving right along.
Piper came to live with us in June; she was a sort-of rescue and I've blogged about that before.
I don't think I finished anything last year - maybe one chart. I'm hoping to do better this year. I'm also hoping to be more focused this year!
The midwife came yesterday and I not only heard the heartbeat (I always feel better when I can hear the heartbeat) but I 'heard' him move! B, the midwife, said "that sounds like little feet"; when she heard this kind of squishy sound through the monitor. I've been feeling him move for a while, but 'hearing' it? Very very cool!
I still need to decide what I'm going to do about my leave. And soon. Sigh.
And you know, I'm STILL waiting to hear about that job!
Pfffffffffffttttttttttttttttttttt

Over for another year

I couldn't connect with Christmas at all this year. Put up the tree, wrapped the presents, spent the day with loud and drunken family members ... and all I got was a lousy headace. And if my sister talked to me ONE MORE TIME about thebabythebabythebaby like she did all day, there was going to be a family rift. I don't mind answering questions and getting advice (she has two children) and I think it's nice that she's excited about this baby but ... hey! HEY! What about me?
Anyway. My mother seemed to have a good day, spending time with her grandchildren and getting proportionally louder as the day went on. For myself, I was glad to get home again.
J and I exchanged presents the night before, when all was quiet. We set a limit of $30 for each other, as things are a little tight this year. I got J the DVD of Sky High and I got Evanescence's new CD and a box of chocolates. Things could definitely be worse!
This year got completely away on me, after we unexpectedly lost Dad in January. After that, it kind of felt like one thing after another.
My sister had her baby in February; I switched shifts at work; J was out of work for a while after the works season finished (he's back at the supermarket now); there was Chloe's ongoing health issues with her leg; and we found out we're having a baby of our own. I'd just like to crawl under something and not come out some days.
But Chloe recovered, the baby's healthy and because J works part-time he does all the housework and the cooking, so all I have to do is go to work and pay bills. I don't have a lot to complain about, really, it's just that some days are better than others I guess.
Next Friday will be a year since Dad died, so that'll be a hard day.
Speaking of things getting away from me ... I'm going to try setting monthly goals again, see how I go. For this purpose, I'm counting from today until January 31. If I wait until December 30 to do it, I'll talk myself out of it for sure.
So I've been thinking about what I'd like to get done in the next month:-
-Write 1000 words a day; see if I can get my mojo back
-Finish the page I'm on and the next one of the Iris pattern for my friend S's wedding
-Get as much possible done of window on cat pattern for the baby's room
-Start DD's Here Be Dragons as your 2007 January start
-Make a list of everyone's birthday
-Finish Pandora's Star and Lord of the Rings
-Read one or two review books; write the reviews every Wednesday or Thursday
-Find out about ante-natal classes
-No Starbucks!
-No buying tea at work
-Get credit card under its limit
-Do one thing off 101 in 1001 days list
That'll keep me off the streets, I think!